Valentine Free write

Posted: February 9, 2011 in Uncategorized

2 years down the line

And again it’s about that time.

Your love soaked into my pores

Candle light dinner, desserts, and more.

You mean the most to me all year around,

But this year’s different because you’re not around.

Our love is so strong

I’ve fraught for so long,

But it’s God’s will and I just feel so wrong.

This time, you made your choice to choose someone else for this day,

My love is here to stay.

I sit and wait for a second chance,

To try at our everlasting romance.

Live for today, and love for tomorrow,

So many memories for my mind to borrow.

You constantly push me away,

When your heart tells you, you really want to stay.

Lying and running from what matters the most,

The love between us is huge from coast to coast.

As I sit here and write, I feel like I also fall for you type,

But that’s impossible,

If I could explain the love, you would say my love is too philosophical,

When it’s more mental and emotional.

My mind constantly thinks of you,

I still feel the fight within me too,

I guess time will tell, and show that I’m just missing you.

 

 

 

What is love?

Posted: February 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

Love means never having to say you’re sorry. Love is missing someone whenever you’re apart, but some how feeling warm inside because you’re close in heart. When I first saw you I was afraid to talk to you. When I first talked to you I was afraid to like you. When I first liked you I was afraid to love you.Now that I love you I’m afraid to lose you. I don’t want anyone else to realize how amazing you are. Everyday that goes by it seems like I discover something new about you to love it’s incredible to me how one person can make such a big difference in my life, you touch me in a way no one else ever has and gave me so many reasons to love you. Because of you… I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a little more. When the angels ask what I loved most about life, I’ll say you. Love is not who you can see yourself with. It is who you can’t see yourself without. I might not get to see you as often as I’d like, I may not get to hold you in my arms at night, but deep in my heart I know that it’s true. No matter what happens… I’ll always love you. If you truely love someone, you’ll forgive the unforgivable. There are moments in my life that I’ll always remember, not because they were important, but because you were there with me baby. True love is knowing a persons faults, and loving them even more for them. I may forget what you said, but I’ll never forget how you made me feel. Sometimes I wonder if life is really worth it, then I look at your smile and I know it truly and deeply is. There’s always that one special person that no matter what they do to you, you just can’t let them go. You know your in love when the hardest thing is to say is good-bye. I looked at you as a friend, then I realized I loved you. Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you was beyond my control. Love you always, love you still, always have, always will. Love is… giving someone the ability to destroy your heart… but trusting them not too. I told myself I would never love and trust again, as much as I didn’t want to, you came along and made me. Love is like quicksand, the deeper and deeper you fall in… the harder it is to get out. Don’t give up on love, because there is always someone who loves you back…and thats me babe (julian Y. Renwrick) lol…. No matter how ugly you think you are, that special person that loves you believes you are the most baddest, cutest and most irresistible person/thing on earth and nothing can ever change that. I love you not because you are perfect, but because you are so perfect for me. Today, if a smile comes to you, a happy smile, the one perhaps you can’t explain, it’s because at that moment, I am thinking of you and smiling too! There are only two times I wanna be with you… Now and forever! You know it’s right when no matter what you’re doing or what kind of mood your in the thought of you can make me smile. When you smiled you had my undivided attention. When you laughed I had the urge to laugh with you, but when you said you loved me, you had my heart forever. One time someone asked me, “Do you think it’s possible to love a person forever?” At first I didn’t know what to say, but then I looked at you, I knew it was true, so I simply replied, “Forever isn’t long enough.” I love you… don’t ever think that I don’t, and don’t ever forget that I do. No matter what you are to the rest of the world, you are everything to me. If you love someone more than anything, then distance only matters to the mind, not to the heart. Love doesn’t make things easier… just worth it. You are everything I never knew I wanted. I don’t say I love you to hear it back, I say it so you don’t forget. At first you didn’t mean much to me because i didnt know what we would be like. I always knew you were something special, but now i know that you’re all I need in my life. True love cannot be found where it doesn’t exist, nor can it be hidden where it does. The truest test of love is if you’re willing to keep fighting for it. Have you ever hated someone so much that you wish they would just leave and never come back… but yet, loved them so much, you knew you’d die if they did? When you held me in your arms, I wanted nothing more than to hold you forever. I do believe that God above, created you for me to love, He picked you out among the rest, because He knows I’d love you best! We are all a little weird, life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and call it love. It’s easier to fake love, then to hide it. You make me smile for no reason what so ever, you make me laugh at the un-funniest things, but most of all you make me love you when I shouldn’t be loveing you. I hug you and I almost feel like that’s where I belong, and honestly, that’s the only place I want to be. When you love them they drive you crazy because they know they can. Why I love you is a hard question to answer. I love you because you care for me like no one else I know. I love the way I feel in your arms, so safe from dangers in the world. I love your eyes, so hypnotic and mesmerizing, beautiful to gaze into, and yet never revealing everything to me. I can explain every way that I love you because that’s Impossible. But I can say I love you because I love you for who you are. Why is it that everyone looks at you and doesn’t see how wonderful you really are? Because I saw it the first time I laid eyes on you. You only think that you’re immune to feelings. The most unlikely person could reduce you to tears, laughter, or spontaneous declarations of love. To love someone when there is no chance of that love ever thriving, that is romance. I just wonder how many people never get the one they want, but end up with the one they’re supposed to have. Don’t push it hard, if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen. It’s weird how sometimes things just have to happen in order to see how you actually feel about someone. When you thought I wasn’t loving with you, you were so wrong, babe, I was in love and loving you. As I laid there on your chest, listening to your heart beat, I knew at that moment that I loved you. The only females that worth loving, are the ones that will take time just to be with you. I just want you to know i truly love you and always will forever and always is “US”. Just believe…..

Always

Posted: February 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

Treat you like your more than what I want…more than you could ever dream… and more than you’ll ever think your are…your everything I’ve ever wanted…i make sure I speak to you  sweeter and love you deeper be true and be kind your more than just a girl… your an angel without wings,the sweetest thing in the world, and is more precious than a thousand roses.. please never frown because you never know when someone is falling In love with your smile, i let you know i care, i let you know by doing something special for you, i wish to call you every night just to make sure every things alright and to remind you i still care…i will always wish you the sweetest dreams in my prayers…when you cry, i want my shoulder to be the first you rest your head upon,just like old times, and cry with you, and just letting you know your not alone, when you laugh, i wish to be the first to hear, when your down, i wish to help you laugh but most of all…when i tell you “i love you” i have to let you see the tears in my eyes…If I had never met you, I wouldn’t like you. If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t love you. If I didn’t love you, I wouldn’t miss you. But I did, I do, and I will… ALWAYS…

Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity Inc.

Posted: February 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

Kappa Alpha Psi is a collegiate Greek-letter fraternity with a mostly African American membership. Kappa Alpha Psi sponsors programs providing neighborhood service, social welfare and academic scholarship through the “Kappa Alpha Psi Foundation” and is a supporter of the United Negro College Fund and Habitat for Humanity. Kappa Alpha Psi is a member of the National Pan-Hellenic Council by which is also known as the “NPHC” and the North American Inter-fraternity Conference also known as the “NIC”. The fraternity is the first predominantly African American Greek letter society founded west of the Appalachian Mountains still in existence. The fraternity was founded as “Kappa Alpha Nu” on the night of January 5, 1911 by ten African American college students. The founders of the Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity, Inc. were Dr. Elder Watson Diggs who was also known as “The Dreamer”, Dr. Ezra Dee Alexander, Dr. Byron Kenneth Armstrong, Atty. Henry Tourner Asher, Dr. Marcus Peter Blakemore, Mr. Paul Waymond Caine, Mr. George Wesley Edmonds, Dr. Guy Levis Grant, Mr. Edward Giles Irvin, and Sgt. John Milton Lee. The decision upon the name Kappa Alpha Nu may have been to honor the Alpha Kappa Nu club which began in 1903 on the Indiana University campus, but there were too few registrants to assure continuing organization.

Throughout this time there were very few African American students at the predominately white at the Bloomington, Indiana campus of Indiana University. They were a small minority due to the period of the Jim Crow laws. Many African American students rarely saw each other on campus and were discouraged and prohibited from attendance of student functions and extracurricular activities by white college administrators and fellow students. African American students were denied membership all athletic teams with the immunity of track and field. The racial prejudice and discrimination encountered by the founders strengthened their bond of friendship and growing interest in starting a social group. Some believe the Greek letters Kappa Alpha Nu were chosen as a tribute to Alpha Kappa Nu, but the name became an ethnic slur among racist factions. Founder Elder Watson Diggs, while observing a young initiate compete in a track meet, overheard fans referring to the member as a “kappa alpha nig”, and a campaign to rename the fraternity ensued. The resolution to rename the group was adopted in December 1914, and the fraternity states, the name acquired a distinctive Greek letter symbol and Kappa Alpha Psi thereby became a Greek letter Fraternity in every sense of the designation. Kappa Alpha Psi has been the official name since April 15, 1915. However, it wasn’t only changed to kappa alpha psi because of the racial slur, it was changed to Kappa Alpha Psi because the “Psi”, meaning very Powerful, thus making it the all mighty powerful Kappa Alpha Psi Greek fraternity. In 1947, at the Los Angeles Conclave, the National Silhouettes of Kappa Alpha Psi were established as an auxiliary group, which membership comprises wives or widows of fraternity members. In 1980, the Silhouettes were officially recognized and granted a seat on the Board of Directors of the Kappa Alpha Psi Foundation. Silhouettes provide support and assistance for the activities of Kappa Alpha Psi at the Grand Chapter, Province and Local levels. Kappa Alpha Psi offers undergrad and graduate membership to potential members, and its constitution has never contained any clause which either excluded or suggested the exclusion of a man from membership because of color, creed, or national origin. In the spring of 1912 Diggs wrote in a little blue assessment book the first Constitution, which was adopted in 1920 with but a few make over’s and revisions. This publication remained in use until 1926 when it was supplanted by the codified edition jointly written by Diggs, J. Ernest Wilkins, and W. Ellis Stewart. In 1957 the Constitution again underwent major revisions. Now significantly established and provided with a Constitution, sacrament, coat of arms, slogan, and guiding hand in a dynamic Grand Chapter, the Fraternity was ready for expansion.

In the summer of 1912, Diggs visited the University of Illinois at Urbana, Illinois, where he met Earl B. Dickerson, President of the Old “Illini Club.” This club constituted the nucleus of the University of Illinois Chapter, the Beta, which was chartered on February 8, 1913. Gamma Chapter, by which was later changed to Indianapolis Alumni Chapter. It was established on December 29, 1913, followed by the establishment of Delta Chapter at the University of Iowa, on March 7, 1914. The latter was subsequently changed to Gamma Chapter, and the designation of Delta assigned to the Wilberforce University Chapter at Wilberforce, Ohio. Epsilon Chapter, Lincoln University, by which was in Pennsylvania, was established December 4, 1915, as the first chapter in the East. Elder W. Diggs journeyed from Indiana to give this chapter his personal and official installation, recognition and blessing.

Kappa Alpha Psi isn’t just a fraternity it is an Organization. They have many other programs and organizations such as, the Guide right program, the Kappa league, the student of the year competition, and the Kappa Alpha Psi Foundation. The Guide Right program is a program for the learning and job-related guidance of youth, mainly inspiring and informational in character. Its reach extends to high schools and colleges alike, giving help and attention to the needs of undergraduate brothers. In 1921, the Fraternity was divided into districts as a result of proposed legislation by George F. David II, the third Grand Polemarch. David was first Grand Polemarch who had not been nurtured by the Alpha Chapter under the influence of the Founders, proposed dividing the Fraternity into decision making districts. The idea was made up by his father who was a Presiding Elder of the A.M.E. Church, by which is The African Methodist Episcopal Church, usually called the AME Church, by which is a Methodist denomination founded by the Rev. Richard Allen in PhiladelphiaPennsylvania, in 1816 from several black Methodist congregations in the mid Atlantic area that wanted independence from white Methodists. Allen was elected its first bishop in 1816, and also members of Kappa Alpha Psi. Grand Polemarch David II, made the division of the Fraternity into three districts. The three districts grew into four regions. Fifth Grand Polemarch Earl B. Dickerson changed the term of “Region” to “Province” and “Regional Director” to “Province Polemarch” at the 15th Grand Chapter Meeting in 1925. And during the original establishment of the provinces, the following provinces were established: Eastern, Middle Eastern, Central, Great Lakes, Northwestern, Western, Southern, and Southeastern Provinces. Kappa Alpha Psi’s International Headquarters is located in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

This program was established in 1922 by Leon Wop Stewart, and suggested at the twelfth Grand Chapter of Kappa Alpha Psi. Guide Right became the Fraternity’s National Service Program. Jesse Jerome Peters, later to become the eighth Grand Polemarch, was chairman of the committee, during the administration of W. Ellis Stewart as Grand Polemarch. The five national Guide Right initiatives are Kappa League, Jr. Kappa League, A-MAN Program, St. Jude Research Hospital, and the premier program, “Kappa Kamp,” by which gives inner city boys to attend camp at the Piney Woods Country Life School in Piney Woods, Mississippi. Additionally, chapters within the Fraternity sponsor a wide variety of Guide Right programs in their communities that support their local youth.

Annually more than 1,800 members are initiated into Kappa Alpha Psi. Undergraduate Chapters are located on more than 377 College and University campuses and Alumni Chapters are arrayed in some 367 cities in the United States and 9 foreign countries. To be considered for membership, a candidate must have a 2.5 gpa on a 4.0 scale. For consideration into Kappa Alpha Psi on the alumni level, one must possess at least a Bachelors Degree or the equivalent of such a degree from an accredited college or university. Kappa Alpha Psi also prides itself in that it has never bestowed honorary membership. I currently attend IUP, Indiana University of Pennsylvania. Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity Inc. is currently suspended, due to them being involved in a fight as of the spring semester of 2009. They were also said to have been suspended because of being caught hazing too many times. Kappa Alpha Psi has never condoned hazing, but is aware of incidents that have occurred. In 1990, Kappa Alpha Psi along with fellow NPHC organizations issued a joint statement announcing the elimination of pledging. The fraternity revised its membership development and intake process. This document instituted strong policies against hazing and has taken steps to reinforce and strengthen its stance against prohibited conduct. The fraternity backed its stance by releasing Executive Order One in 1988, Executive Order Two in 1993, and Executive Order Three in 1994.

 

 

 

Know thyself

Posted: February 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

Know thyself

To Know Thyself can mean a lot of things to man and woman. When one begins to explore this state, it leads to profound understandings about all of creation. To know thyself can make things such as unhappiness, fear, sadness, doubt, and all the negative emotions meaningless. Knowing thyself is a lifelong journey. It is a voyage which should be looked upon with total trust in your personal interpretation and personal experiences to judge. Truth is only known in relation to an individual’s perception of thyself, by which is reality. There is only one reality, and your personal observation of it contributes to only one of many. However, who is the actual perceiver?  ”Who are you, really?” Are you actually who u think u are? Or are u someone who u think you are but really aren’t? Reflect upon the following considerations to have an idea of to why it’s important to know thyself, as a part of reality, as well as to view your awareness as somewhat of a mirror of reality, such that to describe that of which you are aware to the truth about an aspect of thyself.

Gnothi seauton

This quote was inscribed in gold at the entrance to the temple of Apollo at Delphi. The Oracle of Delphi changed the destiny of nations. She was not just consulted by leaders of various Greek city states, but also by king Amasis of Egypt, Solon of Athens, and king Croessus from Lydia. All visited Delphi, in search of her divine guidance. Or rather that of the god Apollo, who spoke through her body. The earliest reference to the Oracle is in Homer, whereas ancient stories say how on the side of Mount Parnassos. There was a crack where goats suddenly began crying and leaping about. When the goatherds approached, they experienced the same, both, the man and animal acting as if they were possessed. Some reported visions, others foretold the future. Some even apparently disappeared into the cleft by overwhelming of the fumes and the losing sense of this reality and suffering the fatal consequences.

Delphi as located in the exact center of the Greek world, it is both an archaeological site and a modern town in Greece on the south-western spur of Mount Parnassus in the valley of Phocis. The word “Delphi” is Greek for “hollow”, derived from the word “delphis”, which means “womb”, by which is closely linked with the navel and the umbilical cord,  and is so vital for the bond between child and mother, and hence said to be instrumental in our relationship with the world of the gods. Delphi was the sanctuary of Apollo. Delphi became the site of a major temple to Phoebus Apollo, as well as the Pythian Games. Even in Roman times, hundreds of votive statues remained, described by Pliny the Younger and seen by Pausanias. Supposedly carved into the temple were three phrases “know thyself”, “nothing in excess”, and also “make a pledge and mischief is nigh”, as well as a large letter “E”.  Among other things, epsilon signifies the number 5. Delphi’s other name, Pytho, means “to rot”, a reference to the decay of the snake’s body that Apollo killed there. The oracle was known as the Pythia. It is clear that mythological speaking, it was considered to be the “rotting corpse” that provided the fumes that put the Pythia in contact with the gods. In The center of Delphi temple was a chamber where the Pythia worked. “Adyton” literally means “do not enter” or “inaccessible” and was thus the Holy of Holies. Inside, only the Pythia and the priest were allowed, with the pilgrims required to wait nearby, where some reported that they could occasionally smell a whiff of a sweet odor, believed to have been the vapors rising from the chasm. Some decades ago, geologist Jelle de Boer trekked around Greece. While in Delphi, he noticed the presence of a fault line. Several years later, de Boer was astonished to find that archaeologists were not aware of this. He teamed up with John Hale in an effort to substantiate whether or not the fault line ran underneath the temple. If this were the case, then it would mean that the ancient authors were almost certainly right and the French archaeologist wrong. After a few years of research, the team learned that the French team had contradicted themselves and had actually found evidence of a chasm but which for some reason was not accurately reported in their final analysis. De Boer and Hale found that there were two fault lines that crossed exactly at the location of the “Adyton” and that rocks in its immediate surrounding area showed clear signs of ethylene, a product used in the early 20th century in operations. So it was now proven that there was a chasm and that there were intoxicating fumes. The ancient authors were right and the French archaeologists very wrong. And the legacy of Delphi could slowly be restored again.

Delphi had two important sayings: “Know Thyself” and “Nothing to excess”. But once de Boer’s research was public knowledge, media and fellow scholars went to excess in their interpretations of the findings this to the dissatisfaction of de Boer himself. The preferred interpretation was now that the priests had not invented everything but had nevertheless rephrased the meaningless utterances of the Pythia into prophecies. Though the Pythia was no longer deemed to be a fraud, Delphi was still seen as a ploy to exploit the desire to believe. Nonetheless, though it was known as the most important religious centre of Antiquity, for scholars, there was nothing special or divine about it. This trend was not new. People like Robert Temple tackled Delphi before de Boer’s research came out, suggesting that the eagles were doves and that the priests had an entire network of informants across the Mediterranean. If one nation was defeated in some battle somewhere in Turkey, a carrier pigeon would be sent from that region, with news for the priests of Delphi, which could then pretend to prophesize an event. It bypasses the central issue that normally, the Pythia would have to predict this event long before the battle began, so at best, what the priests gained was to be kept up to date about whether they were wrong or right and as already mentioned, it is known the Oracle quite often got it wrong. Today, we have hence once again opted for the safe haven, letting ourselves believe that the entire spectacle of Delphi was a show, with no genuine mystical core. De Boer suggested this was highly unlikely, suggesting the prolonged fame and importance of the site and generally, we do not seem to heed that other warning of Delphi “Know Thyself”.

I believe that the Greeks really meant that in order to know one’s self, means that one has to know one’s True Identity, and True Identity means the Distinct Fact of Being one. But it is next to “Impossible” to know who we are by means of the Rational, or the Empirical, or the Philosophical point of view. The Physiologist, the Psychologist, the Nuclear Physicist, the Historian, the Dramatist, the King, the Slave, the Men, the Women, the Transvestites, the Gays, the Lesbians, and, the Chemist, the Botanist, the Genius, the Idiot, the Mythologist, the Realist, The Fanatic, the Extremist, the Racist, the This and the That, and etc, will all have their own Definitive’s and Concepts of what they “Think” we are, but such thinking is not the Truth defining our Existential Reality. Those who are to Believe, shall Believe, upon knowing this far of their True Identity.

Jesus has said in a scripture, “He who has not known himself has known nothing, but he who has known himself has at the same time already achieved knowledge about the depth of all.” He who isn’t true to himself is the prisoner of their life and fears and desires or emotions. He who is true to himself is the successor of life and can experience it to the fullest, with no restraints. I believe that the Human behavior flows from three main sources: desire, emotion, and knowledge. Why? Well because I feel that without knowing these things, will cheat you out of life , and make u blind to who u really are. I also feel that what you desire and what your emotions are the keys to unlocking the knowledge to know who u really are. For example, in my last two years of high school, I became in interested in playing basketball for my school, but all my friends and teachers in my school felt that it was impossible to do, because of how small and skinny I was. So, I went to a school basketball tryout and showed them what I had. Sad to say, the school coach didn’t pick me for neither JV nor Varsity. The coach of our schools team was also the dean of students. I was a good student in high school and never got in trouble. I did things without getting caught. So, by him not liking me, because I wasn’t a trouble maker really made him not pick me for the team. This really took a toll on me. So much of a toll, that I didn’t make it and I knew I could play the game that I loved so well. So I didn’t hang my head for long, I went back to the lab and that whole summer after my 11th grade year of high school I practiced my game every day and even joined an AAU basketball team to better myself.

The beginning of my last year of school has come and, it was tryout day, and when it was my turn to play, I played. And when I say “I played”? I played my heart out with every inch and every muscle and every breath, I played my game. By me using my passion and desire to play basketball, I made the team weighting only 123 lbs, yup the smallest in weight and height on the team. Then, just then, I knew I could do anything. That year, the Freire Charter high school basketball team was the best team the school ever had by receiving numerous awards and division championship and almost winning the state championship. After experiencing that, I believed that I was just so misunderstood and looked down upon that it fed my need to keep going and trying, and then I knew who I was. I was Julian Yvon Renwrick-Chapolini, who is so misunderstood by so many people that, I developed such a killer instinct and valor that nothing will stand in the way of what I want in life, by which is to just be happy and loved by all because Courage is knowing what not to fear, and I fear no one but GOD.r

Nonetheless, to answer the question to why is it important to “Know Thyself”, it is important to know thyself to know about everything. The main purpose of humans coming into this world is to know thyself and to avoid the further cycle of birth and death as per the internal eastern philosophy. That’s why to know thyself, is the supreme command into spiritual practices. If you know all about the world without knowing thyself, it would be a simple waste of energy and time. The creation what we see outside of you is in you also. When you finally know thyself, clearly, completely, then this truth would be revealed. Nothing is outside of what is not in you, that’s why it’s important to know thyself.

 

 

Fearless

Posted: February 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

Emotions play an important part in our daily lives. Fear is one such emotion that is pre-programmed into all animals and people as an instinctual response to potential danger. As for what is fear biologically dialogue, when a person experiences fear, certain areas of their brain such as the “amygdale” and the “hypothalamus” are immediately activated and appear to control the first physical response to fear. Chemicals such as adrenaline and the stress hormone “cortisol” are released into the blood stream causing certain bodily reactions such as rapid heart rate, increased blood pressure, tightening of muscles, Sharpened or redirected senses, dilation of the pupils, increased sweating. People who have experienced this will often remember the moment when action took place and how time seemed to slow down mentally. They knew exactly what to do without consciously thinking about it, they had great strength. Researchers say some have even been able to lift a car to save their trapped child and they felt no pain. All these are protective mechanisms to increase our chances of survival.

While it is important to be aware of potential and real threats, it is just as important to react correctly to them. For most of us, our initial alarm response subsides as soon as we realize that there is no actual threat or danger. However, this is not always the case. There are many people for whom fear becomes maladaptive, as they struggle with anxiety, phobias and panic attacks. Children are also at risk of overactive fear, as they are not always able to rationalize fears that are unrealistic or unfounded. Children experiencing fears and phobias feel very real threats and parents often have difficulty consoling or reassuring their child that there is actually nothing to fear. Childhood anxiety can have a negative impact on their healthy development and may influence them to bigger problems in later life. Thus meaning “Fear” has its positives and negatives.

Fear is an emotional response to a perceived threat. It is a basic survival mechanism occurring in response to a specific stimulus, such aspain or the threat of danger. Some psychologists such as John B. WatsonRobert Plutchik, and Paul Ekman have suggested that fear is one of a small set of basic or innate emotions. This set also includes such emotions as joysadness, and anger. Fear should be distinguished from the related emotional state of anxiety, which typically occurs without any external threat.

Additionally, fear is related to the specific behaviors of escape and avoidance, whereas anxiety is the result of threats which are perceived to be uncontrollable or unavoidable. Worth noting is that fear almost always relates to future events, such as worsening of a situation, or continuation of a situation that is unacceptable. Fear could also be an instant reaction, to something presently happening.

Fear is not always adaptive. A small amount of fear before an important speech serves a purpose. This purpose is to encourage you to focus on your topic and avoid making a fool of yourself by making simple little mistakes. This is one of the types of fear that can be useful to sharpen our minds. However, some types of fear that are excessive can become crippling, or even make you feel like escaping when it is not appropriate to do so.When fear gets out of control, or when we fear something that cannot actually harm us, it can escalate to a point where it effects our daily functioning. Fear is no longer adaptive if we find we are constantly afraid of events that haven’t happened yet. Future orientated fear is known as anxiety. While fear happens at the moment danger arises, anxiety is characterized by apprehension because we don’t know what’s going to happen next, and we cannot control upcoming events. Experiencing an alarm response when there is in fact nothing to be afraid of is known as panic. Many people are familiar with this type of fear and it is often accompanied by a phobia. There are numerous causes of fear. Some are better known than others such as fear of flying or Aviophobia, or fear of spiders, which is Arachnophobia, and fear of confined spaces by which is also called Claustrophobia. Others types of fear not so well known are fear of mirror Catoptrophobia, and fear of hair-Chaetophobia. Fear of being tickled by feathers Pteronophobia, and Papyrophobia or fear of paper are yet other not so well known causes of fear. Still new causes of fear are being diagnosed. Panic is an immediate physical response to unrealistic and irrational fears. This can have a huge affect on both your emotional and physical well-being – as well as your ability to reach your full potential.

Fear can affect a lot of things. Fear can affect things such as the way people go about their daily lives, the way they react to certain things, and also their state of mind. Fear can also affect someone’s performance. Fear can also persuade you to set easier goals and do less than your are capable of, by which sets your performance level at an all time “low”. Fear can trigger internal defense systems and fools people into thinking that you have perfectly good reasons not to change. The fear of failure or disappointment reduces the number of available alternatives and keeps people from pursuing them. One the important forms of fear that can affect a person’s performance is the fear of making mistakes. It causes indecisiveness and confusion. For example, whenever I was put into the game during my high school basketball games, I developed the fear of making mistakes, due to the fact that in practice whenever a person make a mistake they have to either run or be substituted for another player. Fear stops people from knowing what they really want. Fear warps people’s whole perception of their life and what they can do to make it better. Fear keeps a person from asking for help when they really need it or benefiting from the emotional support that was offered to them. Fear also keeps them from asserting themselves and persuades them to settle for what they must settle for instead of going after what they really want. To calm their fears, they develop unhealthy habits and behavior problems. Fear often makes them give up just one step short of their goal at hand. Fear keeps people from taking risks.

There are a number of natural herbal and homeopathic remedies that can help with overcoming fears. Fear becomes a problem that needs to be addressed when it turns into anxiety, panic or phobias. Herbs such as Melissa Officinalis, Lavandula Augustifolia, Chamomile and Passiflora Incarnata are just a few examples of a natural approach to overcoming fears by reducing stress, calming the nervous system and relaxing a fearful mind. Many natural remedies for fear and anxiety combine a number of calming herbs to achieve the best results for overcoming fears and addressing all the different symptoms of a panicked response. The most affective and best way to achieve your goals while dealing with fear is to face your fear with positive fear. For example, even though I was scared and nervous when I was put into the game, I used it to my advantage.  What I did was, I took my fear of making mistakes and I turned them into anger motivation. I got angry at the fact that I become nervous and scared, so I used my anger to developed an “attack mode” to whereas though I played with anger and attacked the rim with no fear at all.

In conclusion, I feel that in order to still achieve your goals while dealing with fear, people have to use their fear and turn it into what I call “positive fear”. By which this type of fear is used to the person’s own advantage, and can be used to ultimately defeat all kinds of fear. Thus, making the person that was first tormented by fear, into some who is so full of bravery and valor that they have become fearless.

 

The 5 senses

Posted: April 12, 2010 in Uncategorized

The 5 senses

The sight of your face and body seems to always make me shudder with joy. I get a tantalizing feeling in the pit of your stomach, utilizing the sight to my own enjoyment. We all have different opinions about what is attractive and what’s not. But I love all your features. I love looking in your eyes, kisses on the lips, the visual of your chest, the caressing of your shoulders, and the soft touch of your legs around my thin waist. I set the stage for intimacy. Layer candles all over the room for a nice glow, the sheets that we love to look at and wearing something that says “I’m sexy, smelling good and I am waiting for you.” This should set the mood for love. I don’t go straight to touching or kissing. We take turns looking at each other. I tell u everything I love about u, while my hands slide down the curve of your hipbone, the long graceful neck. Damn I fully appreciate the sight set out before me. I disrobe your garments one by one; pausing after each one comes off. Take in the color of the skin, the curve and shape and the qualities that force my eyes to each place. Once disrobed, we take turns surveying each other’s entire body. Our bodies are just saying I love you, and damn do I appreciate your mind, body and soul. I then look at the way our body joins together. How the hips flow into the thighs and legs, how the arms saunter down from the shoulders, how the neck connects to the curve of the back. This body before me is truly a masterpiece, and this is the time to let u understand that. After we spend some time surveying each other’s body with sight, it is time to introduce smell. As I get close, I sniff n breath on your neck without touching and take a deep breath through my nose. U smell like the perfume from the Valentine’s Day card, damn I can’t stop now. Then I tell u why I like it. It reminds me of my first sexual experience with you. Then I position my nose right above your hair; savor it and again, tell u it’s perfect. Now, I’m following the curves of your body with my nose, trying hard not to introduce touch. Then I tell u, while whispering, which parts hold the favorite smells and why. It is time to introduce touch. This will tickle. Then, I finally take my hands and starting from the top of the head, work my way down, touching, tickling and massaging each body part. Then u tell me how much you love the way it feels. Now I’m hitting your erogenous zones. My fingers are grazing on the inner thigh. Now, together, we touch the places on each other’s bodies that we both like. We explore it like it was the first time we were ever introduced to the physique of each other’s body. While still touching, I began to taste the soft mellow sweet taste of your lips. We begin kissing. We Start slow to savior every moment, kissing each other lips lightly, nibbling on the top or bottom lip, sucking slightly. Then you open lips so that I can probe my tongue inside your mouth. We take turns. While taking turns, I soon begin running my tongue over your erogenous zones. While tasting you, I use different tongue techniques. First, I just use the tip of my tongue to taste, and then introduce the entire tongue. During this intimate moment, we have been using sound all alone, you speaking to me in different tones and moans of pleasure when being smelled touched and tasted. The taste of your body still hasn’t escaped my memory. Such sweet nector, then you make sounds that utterly drive me crazy. I know which ones are my favorites. Then I start with few loving whispers, and you become as loud or soft as you want to be. U are so beautiful, as we talk in our own body language. Again, our sex life is only one factor in our overall relationship; but, when it is at its best, more times than not, u are my best. Our Intimacy is affection, pleasure, and love all rolled into one, rather than just one or the other, and u and I deserve to experience the joy of a heightened sexual experience with each other.

You Slipped away

Posted: April 12, 2010 in Uncategorized

You Slipped Away…

Is there any chance that u remember me being more than just a horrible man? And would you consider, pulling this trigger, and taking a second shot at us in the future, I know the days I took u as my girl and I was your man, I know n realized I took u for granted n I see how much I love u and miss u, I can’t act fake, I can’t b phony, acting hard is the reason why nigga’s is lonely, when u left u took the very best thing that I had n ever happened to me. What is it about your crazy ass? I swear that every freaking moment all I think about is u, everyday, everyway, so much I can’t take it, what is it really about u? because I never loved a woman harder then I’m loving u, but the truth is that you’re not mine, I know that you want to start a new chapter in your life, and I can ask myself a million times to “Why can’t I be a part of this next Chapter to make and change the story for the better?”, but they way things have turned out, I don’t deserve to be in this chapter, but I have a feeling that our love will grow even stronger and this will just be a few pages, due to the fact that we are the authors and every story have an alternate ending that we can write together, a happy and everlasting ending together, and if I can’t have you the way that I want, my babe, my girl, my love, the mother of my children, my wife, my heart, than I don’t want nobody else! I’m selfish, soooo so so selfish. If I can’t have u, I’m nervous that I won’t have anything left, you’re the sweetest thing, never wanted to break up but we did it. I was at my best when I was with you, I can’t stop thinking of you, and it’s funny how things may rearrange…you used to be my number one, my one and only lover, you made a difference in my life and it happened at the moment I saw your face, it was your eyes that made it easy. It’s not hard to understand, because anyone else that sees’s you, sees and feels the same way. Love looks good on you. Your eyes say it all, their fixed upon an object of desire you can’t control but gravity compels you to ignite and explode till our time and space combine you’ll fantasize…The unknown. Seduce and analyze and the objective is to conquer deep inside… the warmth that only you and I generate when we collide, just hold that, and  don’t make my emotions peak. If I let go then I’ll be weak, your control is my defeat and remember I repeat to never, never, never will I give up. I don’t know if I’ll win but I know that I want to do it again. So I had to take the chance to let you know you’re so amazing and you changed my life in so many ways, I just look back to how I used to be and how you dealt with me. I just want to thank you and give you soo much credit for sticking with me this long. Just in case I never see your face again, just in case the worst was meant to happen, Just in case tomorrow never come, there is something you should know, I’ve given and always will give you every bit of the man I am of the man I am, I know at times it wasn’t pretty. I never held back not one “lil” bit and the world can demonstrate to this…you flipped my upside, down ….listen to me now… You got my life together and I thank you forever… But all that has changed my state of mind you got it right…And i love life. Yo! I love you for life. I know there were a couple times I wasn’t there for you and for everyone of those times I hated myself for it, The way I went about it, the ups and the downs, one foot in while the other foots out, Loving on your loving on another would only kill me emotionally and mentally…What I did to you right here, right now in this here place, in this here space as my heart pour out as I state my place, so I can tell you where I’m coming from…you’ve seen the good you’ve done…So you’ve felt and feel the change, stay with me every day. I want to get to know you and see what makes you laugh. I want to be your future, forget about the past, I want to make u happy by just being me, because I don’t know how to be no one else. If I died tonight before I wake? Know that you touched my life in oh so many ways, and should all this I had to give… would you remember? Remember my heart, remember it was good, remember I tried as long as I could, remember that I gave till I had nothing else, and just remember my voice. I ask myself and it’s so hard to see, how can you see yourself anywhere but here with me? You said that u needed space and time to make up your mind, you said if I set you free, that one day you’ll be ready to come back to me. Did you really mean it? I hope and pray u did ever night…u slipped away.

The goal that i want and  will achieve is the technique of grabbing the readers attention. Grabbing the readers attention , to me , is very important because if u don’t have the readers attention then whats the use of writing, if its not interesting. i feel that using quotes and interesting facts will ultimately inhance the readers interest. through this course, i feel that i can accomplish this goal with all the freedom we’re getting in this course. the function this goal serve is that it will help me grab the readers attention early in my writing. this can be any genre of writing, and anyone is more likely to read it.

“Education is not the process of putting knowledge into empty minds, but of making people realize that which they already know”, said the Greek mythologer Plato. Education isn’t just receiving knowledge, its enhancing the mind on the things it already knows, and thats exactly what i thought marijuana was going to do.Yeah right. There was a time where peer pressure got the best of me. One night i was over my cousins house, and she wanted to get high. Me being me, i said ” chill lets do something else”. She called me a “B#&@h“. so i said “what the hell it couldn’t hurt”. Yeah Yeah. So she rolled the marijuana in a cigar type paper and start smoking, i began to smoke with her. I thought it would be an effect on me, at least that’s what i thought. I was totally wrong. It had a total effect on me.

As we got higher and higher, i started  to fell light headed. Then i decided that i want something to drink, but as i think about it today…..Why would the fuck i want something to drink? Why didn’t i ask someone to get it for me? i don’t know. Anyway, i went into the house by this time, im high as hell. i went into the fridge, and grab the orange juice, and began to pour the juice into the cup. At this time, i began to notice that the cup is moving. i thought i was tripping. So, i successfully poured the juice without spilling it everywhere, my cousin came into the house, high as hell also, insisting that we go out to find my cousin. Why? because my cousin had a curfew, she totally ignored. So. me being the good cousin that i am, i said “Yeah”. So i grab my hoodie. No lie! I was so high it took me ten minutes to find the head part in the hoodie. Lmao. When i finally found the hold…..lmao(insider), i walked her to my other cousins house. As we were walking, i started to feel and see things that i wouldn’t normally feel or see.

As i walked, I began to feel my heart rate pick up. It began to beat as if i was in a 100 meter race, but thats not it. I began to see the clouds in the sky move as if the day was flying by. No lie. i began to worry and ask my cousin was it normal, and she said “Yes, it was”, but i didn’t like the way it felt. i began to become scared. So While walking, i asked her to walk me back, to get me back to normal. As i walked into the house, i began to feel sick, so i sat up down and whine up throwing up. Ewwwwwww! So instead of going back out with my cousin to find her little sister, i choose to go sleep, to sleep off “the high”. the way this story connects to Plato’s quote is that my mind knew that smoking weed would enhance images and over-exaggerate them. Not only, this experience enhanced my knowledge about smoking weed. By which that is, that it makes your heart beat faster and makes me paranoid.

The way i achieved my goals was by using different quotes and using different facts about different topics and writing introduction sentences about them.By me doing this, i began to gain confidence in my writing. To farther tell about my learning experience, I used this technique while taking my final writing exam. The technique put my essay over the top. by me using this technique, i passed my exam with a 94%. I CAN DIGG THAT!!!!

What is “I”???

Posted: August 27, 2008 in Uncategorized
Ima be all i can be......me...lol

Ima be all i can be......me...lol

       What is “I”? “I” isnt just one thing. The way i see it, “I” is a number number of things. Things such as elements that make’s you who you are. For example, “I”, Julian Renwrick, as a whole is a basketball player, but there’s more to me than just that im a basketball player; there’s elements that make me the person “I” am, Julian Renwrick. Julian Renwrick is a well educated,bi-racial male, from the murder populated Philadephia, PA. I feel that these specific elements make me the college student “I” am today. As Kawai stated, in the third chapter of his book, “What is “I”, that ” The “I” of a human being is a composite of various elements. It’s only temperary formed into one thing”. It’s only temperary formed into one thing, to the human mind, but the truth is that, there is more than just one thing that forms a human being.

       As Kawai stated that ,” If u start thinking about “I”, the more you think, the more you find its existence becoming imcomprehensible”. As i sit and think about , What is “I”?, it becomes unclear and becomes unable to think about what it actually is. But soon as “I” sit down and start linking things to who i really am, i start thinking about things such as pasted experiences ,and personal emotions; by which, can both connect to what made you who you are today.

“Foolish people, capture by this ”I”, suffer a great deal. Once you know what this real “I” is, your suffering will disappear at once”, said Kawai Hayao. Many people, that are captured by this “I”, deal with a great punishment. What? Punishment? These people deal with the punishment of not knowing that there is more to a human being as a whole. Little do they know, there are other things that are included, such as, the body, and other elem  Kawai Stated that,”If you start thinking about “I”, the more you think , the more you find its existence becoming incomprehensibleents. On the upper hand, when these people finally realize that “I” is more than just one thing, they will be released of thier punishment of not knowing the elements of me as a human.